My friend J. has a serious problem with a very specific type of shoes: flip flops with soft plastic spikes in the inside, the kind some people use over here to go swimming.
J’s flip flops are great, but the thing is that when he wears them and walks, he gets powerful hard-ons from the massage on the sole of the foot. For him it’s like sexy feet rubbing. He found out last summer, when his friends gave them to him in July, as a birthday present.
The first day he wore them, he caused sensation at the beach. He was so embarrassed that he had to dive into the water, where he cooled off some minutes later. Same thing happened to him the second day. At first he didn’t relate his organic reactions to the flip flops. He was already enjoying happy and satisfactory sex in his life, yet naively asked himself if he had suddenly become a sex wonder.
The third day, he realised what the reason for his sudden chubbies was. Concerned by the possibility of becoming the first flip flop addiction case in history, he decided to give them away.
His youngest brother is the current owner. Happy as can be, he doesn’t give a damn about addictions and always puts them on before a night of sex.
J. now regrets having got rid of the magic flip-flops, but … finders keepers, losers weepers: his brother wouldn’t give them back to him. Not for all the tea in China.
So darlings… come back when I wake up from my beauty sleep in the sun and tell me something nice.
Hipster Yaya 
Do they make those flip-flops in size 15? I have a rather large pal who could use them! :¬)
xxx
Welcome to my house Mr Cheen! Have a seat by the fireplace, drink a glass of Moonshine and make yourself at home.
Tell me, could you please be so kind to ask your Big Feet friend if the myth “big feet, big nose” true? 😉
XXX
PS.- Your memorable interpretation of the “Tennessee Waltz” on soundclod got stuck in my head since last monday and I don’t regret it. **enthusiastic round of applause**
You are too kind! Go raibh maith agat.:-)
That’s true, darling. You really have a wonderful voice and excellent taste for songs. You also speak divinely, live the Chef man… Tá fáilte romhat!
XXX
An interesting post indeed Ms Hipster. Frothy, light hearted, sensual, yet comical. Thoroughly enjoyable, in fact, to the point that my wife has indicated that I am to throw away my current beach footwear… just in case!
Dear Chef, you’re always welcome! Your lady wife is a wise woman and in your place, I would do as she says to invest some money in a pair of magic flip flops. I bet you won’t regret it!
I had an Erector Set with an electric motor but no magic flip flops.
Hm… if you didn’t need the flip flops… then you must be a natural wonder, dear LX! 😉
Hem… in fact, I hope you don’t mind if I ask you… what is your feet size, LX?
I once met a guy who wore size 15 flip flops. He was a compatriot of Mr. Cheen. 🙂
Leni! A true lady never talks about her conquests! ((really? Size 15??? OMG))
He borrowed my white Speedo once, the stains never came out. 😮
I’d recommend you use some sulfuric acid, Mr. Cheen. I hope it helps. 🙂
I’d recommend you remove the Speedo first Mr. Cheen. I hope this helps. LOL
I tried to remove said Speedo but he just won’t sit still long enough for me to get a grip! :¬)
xxx
Dear Mr Cheen, I suggest you try this swimwear. The fat guy’s. Though we all know you’re slim as a toothpick. 😉
Oh…. I want a pair!
As to “something nice”—and somewhat at a tangent–do you sometimes find yourself, erm, *enjoying* a shower? I’ve just had one. A shower that is.
Really, I don’t think you need them, Looby.
As to “something nice”: I certify that hoo hoo playing in the shower – but noth just there- is ***abso-f*ck*ng-lutely extraordinary*** and very recommendable for good health. That’s the true reason why some people sing in the shower. 😉
Oh great, Looby! When you’re clean you look even sexier than normal. What’s your feet size, darling?
7, but you have funny measurements over there, and drive on the right.
Ok Looby, we love you too, my dear Burdish friend! LOL. Good thing we have equivalence tables for these contingencies: UK 7 = EU 41. I’m not going to ask about your nose. 😉
Feliz Navidad
Aww dear LX, thank you very much! What a lovely video with Nativities and such a beautiful music with the lovely voice of Andrea Bocelli!
Christmas is a very special time for me. I’m sad because I remember those that passed away (my three beloved husbands) but I’m happy as well to be with my children and grandchildren, the joy of my life and the future of the family.
I hope you enjoy these days and I wish you a new year full of good health and happiness.
Happy Christmas, Ms Hipster!
Sxxxxx
Oh sweetheart, it’s great to hear (read) from you! I thought you would be quiet for a while after your removal and so many changes in your life! But here you are, alive and kicking!
I wish you have fun these days, enjoy yourself and do the Carpe Diem thing as much as possible.
I wish you and Mr Blue a new year filled with love, happiness, good health and lots of success.
XXX